Sneak Peak

So I have officially moved!! Good bye south... hello Midwest!! Let me begin by telling everyone that people think I am crazy up here. Not only do they laugh (no seriously laugh) when I say "y'all" but they all want to know WHY? Why am I here? Why would I ever leave the south? Why would I ever move this time of year? Why why why... Well Minnesota People. I moved because my job required me to. The end. I don't have an interesting story of why, no I didn't follow a guy, no I don't have family up here, no I am not training for a skiing competition, and no I am not crazy. Just work reasons.

Not only do people look at me like I am crazy, I also have the weather laughing in my face. The night I showed up it was snowing. The next day it iced. The next day I drove to Northern Minnesota where it was 2 DEGREES! I am also lucky enough to find out that it gets below 30 in January. Well Happy Birthday to me! Also last night, it snowed over 6 inches... and I just looked outside now. Yep its snowing again!! So I decided to be brave last night and drive in the snow. Not because I honestly wanted to but because I was hungry. I am living in a hotel and room service is CRAZY expensive. I braved the weather and drove to panera. Ordering a salad and large soup of course! Then I drove around for 15+ mins looking for a Red Box. Sadly I think the Red Box was buried in the snow because I was unsuccessful. I went back to my cozy hotel room and watched an over priced video but what other choice to I have?

This morning I woke up fairly early. Got a work out in, ate some wonderful hotel breakfast and went outside. I was going to brave the roads again to drop off my deposit for me apartment that I am renting! HURRAY! (side note: I am hoping to move in next week. Sadly my stuff isn't coming for another 2 weeks so I will be sleeping on an air mattress) This is what I discover...



Well a Georgian doesn't really know how to properly clean a car of this much snow. But I did try. I am sure there was an easier way but it was my first time. It look me over 15mins, I got tried and ended up quitting half way through, I was soaking wet from snow falling on me and my car was wet inside because I opened a few doors without cleaning them first. Oops... I am sure I will be an expert by the end of the season. Here is the result after 15 mins and finally giving up.



I could see while drive so I would consider it a success. So I survived a week in Minnesota. Only a few more years! ha ha

Shout Out: Kelsey Hausfeld-- I hope you enjoyed this entry along with all the others! ha

Home Sweet Home

So after a YEAR of nomad behavior I have been given my new home. Not only was I shocked but it's somewhere I secretly was afraid of getting the entire time. I made jokes about it, poked fun at the state but never honestly thought I would be assigned to it. Now lets brainstorm a bit together to help lead you to where I am moving. Think opposite of the South (weather wise), think outdoorsy, think not colorado, think lakes, think friendly people, think Vikings and think currently below 20 as the current high.

Thats right I am moving to Minneapolis, Minnesota! At first I thought my boss was joking but he took a very serious tone and responded "Yes I said Minneapolis, Minnesota". Nope he was not joking. So there you go, after a year of not knowing and living a nomadic lifestyle for months I have been given a home. So after receiving this information what is the first thing I do? I google Minneapolis, Minnesota of course. Found out that the average winter months last from Oct-April and the lows can reach BELOW 20.


Then I continued to read about the state and found an article on how friendly, clean, exciting, young the city is as well as it has stunning summers in the state! I never visited this part of the country but it will be an adventure to say the least! So it is official, I will be laying my roots in Minneapolis, Minnesota! So if you are ever in the area, just let me know! Id love visitors! ok ok... its also Beautiful!!!! (observe photo above)





AND I might be a Huge fan of all the out door activities in warmer months! Ok I might be super excited about this move!

Reunited and It feels so Good!

I have finished training and remain homeless. To add icing on the cake, not only am I homeless but I don't even know what my job will be! Long story short, I was training for a position but it might be changed to another. Which means I am going through crash course training this upcoming week. The bomb was dropped on me Friday.


Rather than getting upset, more nervous, more anxious, more lost feeling.... I drive to the grocery store. I walk up and down the aisles and find the ingredients. These are not just any silly ingredients but the perfect ingredients to deal with the bomb. As many of you know, I have been living in a hotel for over four months and have been without a kitchen. I am home again and reunited with the kitchen! I was able to bake wonderful treats for my brothers and sister. I loved being able to get lost in the recipe and forget everything else. I choose this cookie because of the freedom to change the recipe as I wanted. It's a regular cookie with all kinds of delicious additives. It is salty, chewy and sweet combination left me satisfied with my masterpiece. The salty/sweet taste was perfect! it felt so great being reunited to a kitchen again! I am so excited to get my very own kitchen and start sending my creation to all my friends! Let me know if you are interested in receiving baked goods via postal service! Here is the recipe if you are wanting to make this perfect combination and be able to escape the stress of life. Yes, cooking allows me to do that!


Compost Cookies
Adapted from Christina Tosi's recipe on Regis and Kelly

1 cup unsalted butter
1 cup granulated sugar
3/4 cup light brown sugar
1 tbsp corn syrup
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 large eggs
1-3/4 cups all purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
2 tsp salt
1-1/2 cups baking ingredients (chocolate chips, coconut, toffee bits, etc.)
1-1/2 cups snack foods (chips, pretzels, etc.)
1 tbsp coffee grounds

- In the bowl of an electric mixer, cream together butter, sugars, and corn syrup on medium-high until fluffy and pale yellow in color, about 2-3 minutes.
- On a lower speed, add eggs one at a time and vanilla until well incorporated
- Increase mixing speed to high and let it go for 10 minutes -- the mixture will become really pale and will almost double in size
- In a medium sized bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt
- When 10 minutes are up, add flour mixture slowly until just combined, about 45-60 seconds
- Chop up and mix together all of your baking and snack ingredients in a small bowl, and fold into batter with a spatula until just incorporated
- Using a medium-sized ice cream scoop, portion cookie dough on parchment paper-lined cookie sheet and wrap the entire thing tightly with plastic wrap
- Refrigerate for a minimum of 1 hour and up to 1 week
- Heat oven to 400F and arrange cookies on cookie sheets at least 4" apart
- Bake 9-11 minutes, until they are golden in color and slightly brown along the edges
- Cool the cookies completely on the sheet pan (or just eat them immediately...)

Recipe yields 15 large cookies

Faithful Red Wagon!

As many of you had read, I have been traveling the states of Michigan and Ohio for two weeks. This trip consisted of turnpikes, corn as far as the eye can see, thin walled hotels, corn beef sandwiches and a tour of scary Detroit! I have never visited this portion of the United States and honestly, I truly enjoyed it! Everyone had funny accents and sometimes I felt I was on The Jersey Shore rather than in the suburbs of Detroit but it still ended up being a nice trip! I must send some love to my faithful red wagon. National rental car service gifted me with a vehicle that has blind sides that lasted miles. Not only was the navigation system out of date, causing me to get lost often, but my wagon sometimes shock when I reached speeds over 60. Maybe this was a good this because it made it impossible to get a speeding ticket which I am confident my manager would not be pleased if I returned from this trip with on. So thank you again Red Wagon for the memories!

The trip is over and now I am entering into the most stressful week of this job. I have a presentation tomorrow then oral exams Wednesday and Thursday. I must pass everything to insure I will continue having a job. Can we please say "Pressure is On"? It is honestly ok because after this week, it will mean I am VERY close to finding the location of my new home. So I am being to see the light at the end of the tunnel, the sun is setting on this chapter of my life, the clock is winding down, the race is nearly over and any other saying that delivers the message that I am nearly done. Well to be honest, I am excited and VERY ready! So here we go, hopefully in 2ish.... weeks I will know my final destination. I know the Lord will place me in a perfect plan and I can't believe it is already time to shed some light on this unknown factor I have been living with for over a year (since I look the job). The Lord is so good and faithful! I never thought I'd survive but looks like he gives me more strength than I ever imagined!!

Until next time

Trusting in the Plan

So as many of you know... I have no home. I have no roots. I don't know what to write down when an application asks for my address. Basically, I am trusting my entire life in others hands. Now let me state that it was fun at first. The mystery made things exciting! Who knew where I'd be come Thanksgiving. Who knew and at one point I said Who cares! Well people I have reached my edge. I have a limit to my carefree spirit... and it is now. I can't even tell you how many time I have been asked where I am moving and when I don't have an answer people usually look at me like I am crazy. Usual respond is "So you took a job without knowing where you were going?" Yes I did!!! This job couldn't of meet put together any better to meet my ideal job requirements. I never knew this job was even real. I thought it was an idea I had dreamt about! So when I found out this job was an actual job you could apply, interview and be selected for, of course I am going to take it without knowing where I will be living. Back to the point, I have reached my limit of living a no answer life. A few days ago, I was driving down the Ohio Turnpike (if you get a chance drive it and notice all the White Barns... Its is very odd and no FOY did not have an answer. Thanks for trying through random boy who works at the FOY desk!). Thinking while driving this strange Turnpike in the middle of no where. When you drive as much as I do, you have lots of time to think. I thought about the future, the past, what I was going to have for dinner. Basically no thought was untouched. Then my thoughts moved to where I will be living. Will I be in Washington, far away from my family and friends? Will I be in Savannah or NYC or West Texas or East of Chicago or Charlotte? (which are all ACTUAL opinions!) Where will my root begin to be planted? These are all heavy loaded questions... and I have no answers or guidance. Then I rounded a bend and I saw this.....




How can I not trust in the Lords plan?! If he is capable of making a sight like that... I am sure he will place my roots where they need to be. Of course its a daily or hourly struggle to trust in this plan but how beautiful it will be when I am finally able to. To find satisfaction in the MOMENT the Lord has given me, not the coming year or month or week or even day. He has made a plan for me that is perfect and I want to follow it perfectly. I hope this imagine gives you passion to follow and trust in the Lord's plan for your own life. He loves us more than the Sky.... think how much more beautiful our lives will be compared to this sight once we devote our plan to him. It fires me up just thinking about it!

Here comes another day of being a nomad but when its time for my roots to form the Lord will make sure its in a perfect place!

Now, for your enjoyment! Hard hat, protective eye wear, steel toes boots and fire resistant suit of course. I LOVE MY JOB!! Not only do I get to roll around in Lubes (yes I said Lubes... I am a Lubes sales rep!) but I get to be super fashionable in all I wear. Trust me, I am more of a looker in person! I hope everyone has a blessed day and find delight in the Lords perfect and breath taking plan!

A Traveling Nomad!

So here is the deal... I have no home. I am living from Hotel to Hotel. Let me just show you s what I have been living with for the past 4 months. Now this is not be complaining just showing you into the life of a Nomadic young adult.

Hotel number 1:
Holiday Inn Express somewhere in Michigan.



No bad right. Well after about 20 different hotels in the course of 4 months everything starts to look the same. My point next with Hampton Inn somewhere else in Michigan.



As you can see there is a common trend in hotels. They are all the same! I have a price budget so I honestly don't see a change from room to room except the occasional color scheme switch up. Which is always fun and refreshing.
Just when things seem to get old and traveling beings to take a toll on me... I have a moment. This moment occurred once again somewhere in Michigan. I wasn't paying attention to my surroundings then something catches my eye. I begin to see the reds, oranges, yellows, even purples! I begin to look around the trees lining the highway and the only way I can explain this imagine is that the trees looked like they were on fire! That doesn't even do it justice but all the colors reminded me of a warm bonfire. I couldn't even believe how breath taking everything was! Yes Breath Taking!! I know I over use that phrase but it is completely approciate for the situation. The warm colors of the trees made the drive worth every moment. Even after a long day of work plus a 2+ hour drive I was disappointed to reach my hotel. I was enjoying the colors and Lord's beauty!! These pictures are taken by my phone but imagine something 100 times more stunning!!





These moments allow this traveling and nomadic way worth every moment. Of course it gets lonely but during these drives I get to see the Lord's beauty without a distraction!! I am able to find time to grow and become more confident in my faith. I believe everyone should take a moment and treasure these times! They help give you strength to finish the day or even week out. I know I am ready to take on the entire state of Michigan!
On the road again, time to return to my Nomadic traditions of having no home, no bed and no kitchen BUT I get see see the sites! Oh How blessed I truly am!

Surprise!!

So here is the surprise.... I am TRAVELING THIS WEEK!!! Ok so that is no surprise but I get to go to new places. I just got back from Charleston today and am going to NJ and somewhere new in VA Thursday- Friday! Before you get all jealous about all the places I am going, I would like to remind everyone this is for business. And when I am traveling for business, that usually means studying and studying and quizzing and more studying. I loved getting to go to Charleston because I was able to see a good friend of mine from high school but besides getting away for about 2 hours that is about as much sight seeing I was able to do.

I know I am making it out to all work and no play... but my work can be like play sometimes! So here comes my super nerdy side. I got to go to a pulp and paper plant!! I saw how to make cardboard boxes and lots of other cool things like that. Now I know it might not seem like a big deal but this plant is HUGE. It look up nearly 7 hours to tour the whole thing. We also skipped around often and didn't see everything the plant has to offer. Let me just show you how large of a scale we are talking here:



Here is the plant itself from the bridge. Now worries people, all the clouds/smoke you see isn't smoke! It is steam. Simply water being released back into the air. Nothing more than that. No worries I asked to double check because I was quite concern.



Here are some of my classmates by the kiln. This kiln is HUGE as well and longer than a football field. It is spinning and pretty scary. At one point, they opened up a portion of it and we got to see it. It was very intense and pretty overwhelming. Take my word for it, it was very cool!!


So I know these are nerdy new things in my life but I am loving it! It is bringing out such a challenge for me and pushing me to my limits. I am loving all the people I am interacting with and getting to work it. The different personalities are a challenge but it is such a blessing. I feel like I have grown up so much in the past 3 months that I did all through college. No worries, I still love to laugh, never take myself too serious and love to love on everyone I met. So I haven't changed too much but I am growing up! I hope the Lord continues to open doors for you because when he does, he will blow you away every day with the wonders he can give.

The Life as a Lube Professional

I had no idea it has been so long since I have updated! All my many readers, I am sorry I have kept you hanging for so long. There has been a lot of chances happening since I last posted. I am still in Dc training but have been traveling often. Been going to the south, north, midwest, and even a few new places in there. It has been beyond exciting and of course I am tried! I have been learned things that I didn't even have a clue about. Like: did you know the sugar made for cokes is a bi-product from coal MINES! Who would have ever guessed?! I sure didn't ha. I have made plenty of new friends and have loved getting to meet and interact with so many different people.

Here are come pictures from my first job training:



This is me looking at a gear box. Nerdy I know but this is my new job. I will be doing super cool nerdy things every day!


This is called a Drag Line. It is some of the equipment for the mining location. It is HUGE and scary when its moving.


Getting bullied of course since I am the new kid! ha

Now everyone has a small idea what it means to be a Lube Professional! I put on hard hats, steel toe boots, and roll around in oil and grease. At least it doesn't take me long to get ready in the mornings!

Here are some other pictures of my new friends and adventures because of course I am not all work and no play! I have to find some time to get in the important stuff such as friendship building!


Float trip with my training class.


I got to visit Abigail and Felis in the Big Apple!


Jimmy and Sunshine were reunited during my Auburn trip!!! I also got to see my sweet Brenton!

This experience has been such a blessing! I have grown and developing into a young woman that I am very proud of. I have not lose my Faith, family, friends or overall goal for myself. I know the Lord has big plans for me but I still have another month of training and growing. This season of my life is a perfect transition. I am not quite in the real world but am slowly stepping into it. Of course it is hard not knowing where I will be living for potentially the next two years but I know it will be wonderful. I am confident I will make new friends and of course always have my old. I continue to receive blessings and it helps me grow. Life is hard and always changing. These daily challenges are difficult but I will not allow them to let me miss out on my life. This past weekend was hard (LONG story) but I am growing and learning. I may never understand everything that has been put into my life but I know it is in the Lord's plan and it will help me!

This life I have been given gets better with each coming day. I honestly believed I would not love my job as much as I do now! This day I lived to the fullest and will only continue to live the next with the same attitude! Thank you Lord, Please help me continue down a path that is faithful only to you! Until next time, keep living a life that is worth something!

Frustration

Let me take you back to last night: I was in the mood to blog and tell the world How wonderful my life is and how everything is peachy. Then things changed. Well I got in a small tiff with someone and it ruined my blogging mood. I didn't want to blog negative feelings because it wouldn't represent my life. I didn't want the blogging audience to know I was upset and not feeling up to standard. So I didn't blog.
Today, I was excited to come home after a successful work day and try again at telling the world how amazing life is and how blessed I am and blah blah blah.... as I am loading my computer up to blog my frustration comes back. Why is that? Why am I frustrated over something that I jogged off earlier, vented about it with my New friend and was overwhelmed with blessings today. But my thoughts still went back to my frustration. I think I naturally don't like leaving things unresolved. I need to have things worked out. Have a neat bow at the end of all my stories. If there are words left unsaid or I am uneasy about how things worked out... I don't feel comfortable about it. I feel like I need to contact this person and work it out either with a good or bad conclusion. I am 22 years old I am still learning brand new things about myself. Its just an odd thing to realize that you have such a strange quality about yourself. Its not taking away from my day, or ruining my mood or anything big just this small nag in the back of mind that comes back.
hm. Thats all I can really conclude of it. I am just going to have to get over this because nearly nothing comes with a neat bow on it. I am going into a sales positions where I will not get that bow often and I can't have that frustrate me every time. I won't survive out there in the sold lonely Sales world.
With this last sentence, I take a moment to think. There is so much more to life in general. We of course have flaws but I can do so much better than them. I can step above them. I can't believe I nearly accepted this "ok" performance of myself.
New theme song: With Everything- Hillsong United. I want to give everything to the Lord and give him deserving praise!! I am not going to allow myself this "ok" standard when the Lord asks so much more of us! Be encouraged to ask more of yourself. Do not take things laying down and accept them as is. Frustration or not, fight to be better and give the Lord everything you could ever wish for because he has so much to prove! Be lifted up today and find the passion to do more for yourself!

Light

So there is starting to be more light in my Life Path! Just a small flicker but everything counts. Today was a small victory but it felt huge for me because I never allowed my anxious thoughts take control. I never allowed my mind to travel to the future and begin to worry about the unknowns. I stayed calm and remained to keep my eyes on the Lord. With this, he has blessed me with a wonderful 3 weeks of work without a worry and now I am starting to see my path before me. Not a lot but enough to give me confidence that my feet at resting on solid ground. Even though in the big scheme of things I know today will be forgotten quickly but it was a huge victory for me! I was able to prove to myself that I am faithful and have the ability to focus only on the Lord who lives in my nows. The contentment and control are coming slowly and I can feel them taking the reins.

I continue to move forward on this dark path but I have the flickering light next to me. I am confident it will only grow in time to illuminate my future and life the Lord presents for me! What an exciting thing to look forward to! I am excited for the future but I am more than content only thinking about now. Here I come tomorrow and the days after! I plan on keeping you beyond my grasp and understanding where you belong. Thank you Lord for these small victories. They provide more strength than I could have ever imagined.

Contentment and Control

I have found a church!! I am beyond excited. Its a mega church (1000+ members) but it is perfect of my current stage. They have a large young adult population which is perfect for me right now. I am moving from a college lifestyle to an "adult" lifestyle. I am not completely at full responsibility level but I am approaching. This church will be perfect because it allows me to refuel on worship and they have a million bible studies for me to get involved in! I have already emailed the head bible study lady and I can't wait to hear back from her.

I wanted to start off on a light now. The title examples all the things I have come to realize that I am truly struggling with. While I was sitting in church service, the pastor began with the opening statement "We are going to discuss what makes a woman a Godly woman". I better get my pen and paper out cause I am going to need to take notes on this topic! As I sit there and listen to his message unfold ,which is supported with verses and other life experiences, I realize that I am no were close to being a Godly woman. I am not content with my entire life and I struggle with letting the Lord take full control. When I realized this about myself I not only because frustrated with myself but also with the Lord. I am just going to be blunt. I am not happy that the Lord has allowed me to become single again. I thought I was out for the count. I had checked that box and had moved on. When I dated the last boy I was with, I was so over being single and I was so excited to have such a wonderful man enter into my life. Well since the break up, I have not found myself angry with the boy or anyone else until now. I am flat out mad at God. I prayed against that relationship for months trying to protect my heart and not allow myself to get hurt. Then about 3 months ago, the Lord told me to drop my walls and trust this relationship. I took that as "This is the one". Was I way off base! I am just frustrated that the Lord allowed my heart to be so open and ready for wounds.

When I found this sudden frustration, I became more upset with myself, then I suddenly wanted to let it go and loose control but I was too upset with being single to let it go completely, finally I was back to square one with being frustrated with the Lord again. How do you end this cycle? I have currently given everything up in my life except this tiny thing. Everything in my life appears to be going well except for this tiny thing. This is the only thing holding me back from completely and fully trusting in the Lord. Diving deeper than I ever have been in my relationship. I will discover things about the Lord I've never known before all I need to do is let go. I want to be like David and be a woman after the Lords OWN heart. I want to seek God in all I do but this one thing is preventing me. Its not any one's fault but my own. It would be easier to just let it all go at once but of course my head likes to complicate things. Contentment and Control. Two very simple words that I just need to follow... Deep Breath. Relax. Close my eyes and open my heart, I am here Lord. I am ready to give it all up. All the hurt, all the sour memories, all the good and of course all the bad. Every boy that has crossed my path and left a mark along the way. I want to give it all up! You are the one in control and fighting though this storm. Here we go with this other life we have to continue to live.

Traveling Alone

Common theme of my recent blogs has been about my life and entering into the adult world. Granted I have only been in it a little over a week, I can already feel myself transforming! Let me begin by explaining that I went on vacation after a week of work. Trust me, it was much needed. Poor me. Well I left directly from work to get to the airport. Of course I leave 2 hours early because I'd like to consider myself a nervous flighter. I am not sure why. I have literally flown the world but for some reason I can feel anxiety set in when it gets close to take off time. So I am waiting in security and a young man behind asks me if I am heading home from a busy trip.

Wise and well traveled business woman (aka me) turns to this other young business man and say "Yes I am. I just left the office and heading out for a family vacation only to return to another busy trip on Monday morning." His response "Wow I understand the traveling. Well good luck with your travels. Hope the road isn't to rough on you!"

Man did I trick him! I wasn't a well traveled business woman (well at least in the sense of business trip) but I tricked him! I sounded like a pro. Today I appear completely differently at the airport. I am in a big tshirt, shorts and tennis shoes. I look like a college student heading home from a beach weekend. My wisdom I've gain this pass week has faded simply because of my appearance. I guess that is how life is. Depending on how you look depends on how others view you.

Well since I have a small layover before I reach my destination, I have decided to people watch. People watching is an art! You can't get caught but you have to watch just long enough to be able to develop a story. There are so many stories to tell! There is a newly married couple that is coming back from a honeymoon because they are both slightly on the red side and can't stop kissing each other or holding hands, or the loving father that finds a way to kiss each of his children while walking down the terminal, or the business man who travels often and he seems numb to the people around him or the grandpa that has called his wife at least twice to tell her he loves her. These stories are all so different. These people are all so different. At this very moment, I don't think about their house, or how much money they have or where their final destination is but do they love the Lord? Do they have the love that continues to save me? Do they even know what they are missing out on? These are the moments I want to yell GOD LOVES YOU. But honestly, how many people do you think listen? What about I just have the conversation with a military man sitting by me that doesn't look a day over 18, or the middle age woman who has had a long week of traveling or the new hire who has moved to a new place just like me! These are the people we are challenged to touch and make a difference with. These small conversations can have such an impact on people's souls! Life is so short but we have SO many chances to spread the word of God. We have to take advantage of every opportunity we have.

Life is hard, trying and unpredictable. I know my life I will physically be traveling alone more often than most but I will never truly be alone! The Lord will walk with me and guide me through everything I have ahead of me. I am always interested to see how things work out but until then I just have to keep living day to day.

Beyond Blessed

The past couple of days have been the longest, hardest, and most rewarding days I have ever had in a row. I have been given a chance to preform at a level I never knew was possible in a person's career. Everyone I have met in so in love with their job and have a passion that I haven't seen in most adults I have experienced in my own life. I am beginning to see why my life is moving the way it has been. My major finally makes sense, the relationships I have formed are coming together and even my recent struggles have better prepared me than I ever thought they would. Don't misunderstand, I hardly have anything figured out but I know the Lord is speaking to me and guiding me to do great things. Being surround about individuals that have high values for themselves is extremely rare and allows to show me how much can be gained by continuing down a fulling lifestyle. I do not even deserve any of this.

The Lord continues to bless me in way I never knew were possible in a lifetime and it leaves me in awe treasuring all these moments I have. I am learning, being challenged, growing as an individual, and preparing to move and leave a legacy of my own. I have a great opportunity to speak to a man that has had an inspiring life. He has held 12 different titles in 18 years because he continued to do great things for the company and they wanted to continue to us him to improve other areas. He was asked "What was his legacy within the company?" He took a moment to give some thought to the question. Turned to our small group of 3 new hires and said "Improving and helping others find their own!" WOW!!! I want to live that lifestyle. I was left speechless (which doesn't happen often) and I knew that was a lifestyle to reflect. These types of moments which I have had often this week have left me feeling beyond blessed in the life that the Lord has chosen for me. This day was a great day and I know the next will only bring me closer to the Lord! Just keep on living

New Chapter

Here I am in my new home. Starting new things. All by myself.

These past couple of days have been eventful to say the least. I went on a 12 hours road trip with my mama and memaw. These women are more than interesting to say the least. They can literally talk for hours. I feel like memaw knows the entire city of Huntsville and has story after story. The first 3 hours of the road trip I joined the conversations and wanted to be a part of them. After a certain amount of time I became confused in the entangled social network my memaw is a part of and my mama was raised in. I enjoyed the time I had with them. Listening to them with music planning in the background allowed me to see the potential relationship I could be able to form with each of them. It allowed me to be excited for the unknown future I have with these women. I was thankful for these woman and laughed to myself listening to them. Dinner the first night was eventful. Young and youthful Cate decides to walk into the boys bathroom and ask a gentlemen in there that if this was the women's bathroom. Most people would know that if these is a person of the opposite sex in the bathroom it is a dead give away that you are in the wrong place. Not me. I stood in there about a full minute before noticing the equipment in the bathroom that is only located in men bathrooms. My mama said I was a shade of bright red she has never seen a person to turn before. King beds are big but difficult to get good night sleeps when there are three people in one and you happen to be in the middle. What to know how I got my assignment? Not because I asked for it. Because my memaw said that she can't sleep next to windows and my mama gets hot flashes in the middle of the night and needs to have a way to allow her leg to escape the covers. Guess that means I am in the middle. Unpacking and exploring my new home was fun and scary. Realizing that I would be here alone and my only family is a plane flight away is something hard to realize. Saying goodbye I thought I could handle. I will be seeing these women in 5 days for our annual beach weekend. The moment I hugged my mom, the tears came. I think mothers have a way that when they pull a string and the emotions come from no where. Then they were gone and I was alone. Officially on my own.

Tomorrow begins a new chapter for me. I am entering into the adult world. I have been trying to live in the nows and not look too far to the future. This has been testing my faith and has helped me through several difficult situations the past month. My life has always been set for the moments that I have been living them. These unknown and anxious thoughts have stayed in my future where my mind was not going until this very moment. The dark tunnel that I have referred to before has become my now. It has become the moments I need to focus on and live. I don't know what will happen tomorrow or Tuesday or even Friday. I don't even see my feet below me. It's scary and I know a lot of young adults are going through these exact moments I am experiencing. People have has these moments and survived a million plus more before my own experiences. I am sure each person has felt the exact same as I do right now. Knowing this and believing this are two completely different things. I know the Lord will guide me in my future. I know he will challenge me and help develop me into a woman who is ready to lead others, find someone to love, spread his own word and make a difference in people's lives. I am not looking to change the world as a whole but if I could impact a single person, that is the world I would love to change. Its hard to get your heart and head on the same path. I have to trust he is going to great things and even though I can't see my own feet he has a strong grasp on my hand and taking me down a path I never could imagine for myself. I need to have faith in him and trust that he has that very perfect plan.

First lines of my quiet time, "I am nearer than you think, richly present in all your moments." He is here with me in my now. My unknown, scary now that I am currently living. This portion of my life is going to put my faith to the test! "Now faith is being of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" -Hebrew 11:1. I do not see anything right now but I have faith he will provide and do great things in my life. Well here I come New world, New life, and New chapter! I am scared, excited and so not ready but this is the path the Lord has given me and placed before me. I have a strong grasp on his hand and don't plan on letting go. I will survive this storm and the darkness will turn to light.

Moment of Stillness

The world stops. You have been given a moment to breath and take everything in around you. As I am swinging on our porch, the skies open and it rains. Not that light summer rain that you know will pass quickly. The rain is hard, the thunder is loud and its a rain the Lord gives to the Earth to help continue growing. I treasure these moments. I breath in the air that is mixed with the smells that summer brings. Its calm and the world is still. As the rain pours all animals, insects and even people are finding protection. So there is nothing out in the rain but the rain itself. I don't get to have these moments on this porch for much longer. These moments are when I find satisfaction in my life and with the road ahead of me. The rain continues to fall heavy on the roof and my mind begins to wander. I think about nearly every aspect of my own life. The good, the bad, the hard and the nearly impossible to ever understand.

I find my thoughts coming full circle again and again to a common aspect. My walk with the Lord. I don't lead a very interesting life. I am not across the globe saving children's souls. I am not going to school to become a missionary or pastor or any of the above. I have been put on this world to do something but I haven't quite figured it out yet. The Lord has given me passions that are extremely different from an average southern college grad. I don't want to be married for at least several more years. I don't want to strictly be a stay at home mom. I desire to work and help others through leading by example or in a brief meeting. I desire to work with children either through bible studies or youth groups. I remember the men and woman that had an impact on my young life while seeking the Lord and I would love to have a small influence on others in the same aspect. Still haven't quite figured that one out yet. I desired to learn more even though I am through with college. I thirst for knowledge. Not just math and sciences but knowledge in everything life has to give us. I am independent and extremely strong willed. These differences in my own life have helped develop my own path. I am about to step into complete darkness. Not knowing what to except in this new portion of my life. I am staring into the darkness and will be entering into in only a few days. Its scary to say the least but then I feel the gripping of the Lord grasp on my heart. I know it will be fine. An adventure of the unknown.

The rain slows to a stop. The loud thunder that shook my house is nearly a small rumble in the far distance. As the storm moves, it gives more individuals the opportunity to have a moment of stillness. My moment has passed and my thoughts are gathered again and better prepared for the unknown. These upcoming days are unpredictable and unplanned. Time to begin to live in the darkness but what a thrill it will be when I reach the light and know I have survived it all!!

Preparing my Heart

Preparation is a pretty easy concept to understand. You have a task that needs to be completed and you gather the needed material to be successful. The gathering, learning, studying, understanding, etc is called the preparation stage. What if you needed to prepare for something that you don't even know when it is coming. It can be nerve raking. I am moving away from all my family and friends and preparing to enter into the corporation world! Don't misunderstand I am beyond excited for this opportunity and I know I am going to learn and grow in the next few months more than I have over a span of years. How do I prepare for that life though? I can't study it or gather the needed tools to ensure I will be successful. This life is not just about my job. Its about finding a new home, a church, friends, and maybe someone I can spend this new found life with. In school, you have a set standard that you must meet to make sure you get an A or the grade you are reaching for. You look online before entering into the classroom and read what will be expected of you. You are able to prepare for this class and depending on your work habits get ahead of other classmates. How do you do that with life? I know I have certain tools I have developed over the years through my working experiences, internships and other situations but besides that I feel kind of lost. I am going into the unknown and I have never felt so under prepared. This is where faith takes a hold of your life!

My relationship with the Lord is always changing and moving in different directions. Not because of God but because of my own doing. This man has played different roles in my life depending on my current situations. He has been the ALMIGHTY God, to a loving dad, to a strong support, to a shoulder to cry on and now my guide! This is how we grow and develop into Christians that are able to help support others because you have been through situations that the Lord was able to help you through. I have been at the lowest lows where I believed no light could ever shine. I have had my heart crushed but more importantly my spirit destroyed. I have believed that there could be no hope for my future and I would never have any of my hearts desired completed. Then I receive a phone call, a letter, a random strange that shows me the love of the Lord and no darkness can escape the light!! I am blind and walking through life. I am blind to the world because I am focused on God. Good things are going to come to me in the future. I know this and I trust in this! I am excited to see what the Lord puts in my path! Preparing my heart for this life is exciting and ___________. (fill in a word that describes I have no idea what I am preparing exactly for) Today is another day that is a gift to me! I am blessed it was given to me and we will see what tomorrow brings. Until then, the preparation will continue!

Reunion

MY SISTER IS COMING HOME!!!!!!!!! I am beyond excited to have my little sister return home. Granted she will only be home for about 48 hours those are going to be the best hours I have had in weeks. She has been going for nearly 8 weeks. I think this is the longest we have ever been a part. The worst part has been she has been without a cell phone, Internet, anything for nearly the entire duration of the weeks. This summer has been eventful to say the least and I have hated not having her here with me. I know I am the older sister but she is an outstanding woman. For those who do not know my sister, I will give a small description to help you form a small understanding of her. She is the most loving person I have ever met, she challenges me in my walk daily, she lives above the worlds influence, she has an intimate relationship with the Lord that most people will never understand or reach, she is a great listener but she will tell it to you straight, and has been my support for nearly everything in my life. This woman is an outstanding individual and I get to claim her as my sister! How humbling is that? So I am going to the airport and picking her up. We have over a month of catching up to do and I can't wait to hear her stories ad adventures she has had while she was away.

So today is a big day!!! I am thinking maybe making her a cake for her return. Issue: she has been away from Internet along with sweets and caffeine. I need to put some more thought into this then we shall we! I hope your day is lived out fulling and completely because today has been given to us as a gift but tomorrow is never guaranteed.

Musicals

So this evening I had the honor to see a musical with my dear mother. I am not sure if you have heard of this production but its called Phantom of the Opera. It kind of has been running for awhile and has a movie made after it but in case you haven't heard of it, I will give some back ground. There is a phantom that is ugly and crazy and kills people but loves this woman who loves a better looking man who loves her back and she chooses him over the phantom which makes him mad and so he goes crazier and forces her to marry him and (break for a breath) ends up having a heart and giving her bad to the better looking man. The end. I am not sure what it is about musicals but I think they are magical. The costumes, dancing, singing, lights, the story. Everything about them make me feel like its Christmas morning! I am an "adult" but I literally become a child the moment the curtains hope. I find myself smiling through the entire production.

When I saw Wicked I don't think I relaxed in my seat the entire time. I sat on the end of my seat, watching the actors flow across the stage and unfolding this story that was beyond anything I could imagine and I became captured. Maybe I am alone on these thoughts but musicals are amazing. They allow you to run away from the world and join something else. You become a part of the story and as the relationships unfold on stage they unfold to you as well. I become emotional involved through out the show. If there is a fight scene, I am usually out of breath or tired afterwards because I involve myself in the scene.

What if life was like this? We sang everything and nothing was spoken. Don't you think things would be so much better? Personally, I do not have a beautiful voice. Sadly the Lord blessed my sister with this gift since she entered this world. She was the kind of child growing up that would sing and we would ask her to stop and she never even realized she was singing. Or we would be in Kroger stopping for groceries and she would belt out in a melody over oranges and apples. She never had voice lessons it was just a gift given to her. I was in chorus for a few years then I realized how terrible I really was. My teacher liked me cause I read music well but I could never hit notes. I was the girl that had to hit low notes to help show the other middle school boys what it was suppose to sound like. Even though I do not have a musical bone in my body, I LOVE music. I enjoy everything that has to deal with music. I went to a festival last summer and it was heaven for me! Everywhere I turned, there were stages filled with some kind of musician playing. I wish I could walk around with my Ipod always in my ears. My favorite movies have dance or music inspiration. Maybe its because I am so UN-musical that I have such an appreciation for it. Maybe some day I will be able to enter in that realm. Or maybe I will always be an outsider looking through the window into this beautiful world that I know I can never reach which allows me to always have this great appreciation for it. This evening allowed me to be a child before officially entering into the real world! I love every moment of it and these moments will always allow me to return to my childhood and help me find pure joy in the smallest things!

These our the days we have, I am enjoying the living I am doing and look forward to everything else that is to come including the music.

Hopeless Romance

Have you ever been so in love that you feel blind to the world. This person is the first you think of when you wake and the last thing you will ever think of. This person is always on your heart and you want the best for them. You watch them struggle but you continue to love them. They turn their back from you but you continue to love them. They hurt you, disappoint you, let you down, break promises, choose someone or something else or simply don't love you back but still you continue to love them. Sounds crazy right? Sounds like this person is a hopeless romantic that is blind with pure unchanging love. How about a little twist is added to the plot of this story. What if you were the one being loved on? What if you were doing all these terrible things to this person but they continue to love you? What if this wasn't a person at all but the one who created everything you will ever lay eyes on? Our relationship with the Lord is always changing and moving in different directions. He has given a clear line to follow so why can't we simply follow it? I know I over think, over analyze, and expect the worst. How can I develop a relationship with the Lord if I live my daily life this way.

I believe I am a hopeless romantic. I love all the icky things that go along with it. The gifts, the surprises, the treats, or the simple notes reminding people you love them. I know I am guilty of blindly loving people. It takes a lot of me to fully trust someone but once they gain my trust it is game over for me. I trust them more than you can ever trust someone. I love them more than you could ever love someone. I never think bad things, or believe they will ever wrong me. Then something changes, they hurt me and I am left devastated and confused. I have to start over and rebuild my trust and love for that person from square 1. It all goes back to the beginning. What if God worked that way? What if every time we wronged him he makes us start from square 1. I think I'd be at square 1 my entire life. I would never be able to even reach another square. That is amazing to think that he loves us so much. I thought I was a hopeless romantic but He has me beat by a long shot.

Every girl wants that love story that puts everyone at awe. I even know some guys who desire this as well. We want someone to always love us and shower us with gifts that we never deserve. Guess what! You are living one this current moment. God puts together a beautiful sunset and sunrise every day for YOU! He is there through kind word from loved ones. He is that breeze that you so badly need when you are running. He is there at the bridge that causes you to trip but you continue to laugh a much needed laugh for nearly 20 mins. He is there for all of that. He knows when we ache for something and he will provide this for us. He wants to see us smile and laugh and find joy in the days he has given us. He gives us these good and bad times so we are in continual thanks of him. What a story I have with God! He has blessed me with a family that blows me away with the love they are ready to give me. He has given me friends that I couldn't of hand picked better. Some are in my life daily while some enter in during much needed times but they are there with love and support. He has even given me my swim team, my job, Auburn, my sorority, my support, my personality, and my passion for romance. HE has blessed us with things that you never even consider how amazing they truly are until you sit and think about it.

The biggest hopeless romantic is knocking on your heart and wants to be invited in. He will shower you with love and gifts that will put you at awe everyday. Trust in his plan and live in the nows. You will never get the nows back once they have left you. Treasure them and grow from them and have a story book romance with the one thing that will never stop loving you!!

June 29th

So my quiet time today told me that my first thought of the day should be the Lord. He is excited for us to wake up and think of him. Hmmm let me see what my first thoughts were.

1.Ugh who invented alarm clocks?
2. Why are beds more comfortable in the morning?
3. Do I really want to go running this morning?
4. What can I eat today?
5. Wow that was an odd dream last night.
6. Oh hey God.

I literally thought of anything else in the world before ever considering God. The moment my thoughts turned to him my anxious thoughts vanished. I have confidence in this day knowing that I am facing nothing alone. I went on a run and was able to catch up with a great friend while dying in this heat, I have a swim meeting at 1, then swim team banquet tonight! I love that many people can't believe I am actually a girl once I shower and put makeup on. These banquets always make me feel good about myself so today should be another wonderful day. I think I need to create habits that allow me to turn my thoughts to God initially. I will have confidence more quickly and I can face this day more cheerfully.

My common thought process recently is practicing living in the now. I have ever lived this way so it is such a change for me. There is less stress about the unknowns, I am less focused on myself and more on others, and man is it hard!! Its new and different but I know the Lord is using this time for change and help develop me into the Christian woman he wants me to be. I graduated only a month ago and who I was then and who I am becoming is extremely different. I was anxious for the future and was worried about distance but now I don't consider either topics. I am focused on the Lord along with other important relationships in my life. Distance is hard on all kinds of relationships but I love these people and I plan on keeping them in my life for a very long time!

"O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water" --Psalm 63:1

I am seeking the Lord and I am excited to see what he has ahead of my but I am loving the nows that he continues to shower at my feet. I deserve none of it and that is why I will always remain thankful in the Lord! This day is just another day full of life and love. Enjoy!!

All grown up!

So its official. I am a grown up and there is no turning back. I called my hotel today and told them when I should be arriving. Crazy!! Its only weeks away now. I am trying to put together a list of things I need to do but I honestly can't think of too much. Besides going to the mall and buying grown up clothes, I think I am nearly ready. That is so wild to think I am about to enter into the Adult World. Where babysitting money turns into a salary, where saving for a new pair of shoes becomes saving for retirement and etc. Once you enter the adult world does your mind set change completely? I think I am a fun person and I don't want to loose that because I have entered the grown up place. Is it still acceptable to hug people when you haven't seen them in a long time or is all hand shakes now? Hand shakes are for strangers I think I'll stick to hugging. I just wonder what adult me will be like. I hope not too terribly different. I have seen so many people enter the unknown of the grown up world and they become so boring. I still want to be silly with my best friends, laugh a lot, get loud because lets be honest I don't know how to be quiet, love everyone I come in contact and give lots of hugs. I am entering extreme adult world and its called corporate. I don't think these people have any idea what they are about to have coming there way!

So maybe I am not completely a grown up but I am entering into a new place where there will be grown ups. I just won't count as one of them. Not yet at least. Maybe I'll consider myself a grown up once I have kids or maybe when I retire. Those seem like more appropriate times to grow up. Looks like I have plenty of time to remain as I am!

This weekend was beyond a blessing. I got to spend some quality time with some very dear friends and actually reunited with some that I haven't seen in years. As I am sitting on the upstairs loft talking with 2 of my best friends I realize that we will always remain this way with each other. Even though I might not have them down the street anymore, I will always remain the same with them. We will talk about all the problems of the world and help be there for support. The best part of our conversation when it moved to be focused on our walk. And we listened to each other, advised each other and grew in the Lord together. In those few hours we all became closer to the Lord as well as each other. What a blessing that I have entered the grown up world but I know I will remain the same. Real life is scary, unknown, always changing and sometimes overwhelming. With all of that considered I am excited to continue with it. There is so much more we have to look forward to!

The Kindness of a Card

So my day began better than the last but still seemed like a normal day. I have had a good night rest, ate some breakfast, successful swim team practice, got to talk to my sister on the phone, go to the gym. Then it suddenly changed. I checked the mail and I received two cards from a dear friend. There wasn't a long message in them just a short sweet "Thinking of you". That is all. Suddenly I am overwhelmed with love and become emotional! I have a dear enough friend that loves me enough to send me a small encouragement. She knows I am overwhelmed with several different situations and just wanted to send some love. Most people in the world will never have that kind of friend and I have been blessed with nearly 10! I will get random text messages just sending love or no message at all. The best part is that I return the favor. I love to randomly reach out to my friends when they come across my mind. Life is busy and we very bundled down with issues and other topic we have to deal with but friends always remain! Thats is whats so amazing about the life I have been blessed with. OF COURSE i have my fair share of issues and heart ache but the gifts that I have been given will always win. Today was a reminder of that. No matter how hard things get, we will survive and have friends there standing by us. So I challenge you today to reach out to a loved on or friend and tell them you care and you are just "Thinking of them". It will affect them in a way you will never know and could be the encouragement they need to make it another day through their life struggles. Here is just a little picture of the card I received and I LOVE it!!! It has literally made my year so far. I am interested to see if anything is able to top this.

Well thats just another day to day living and it's only getting better!

Comedy of God

The first sentence in my quiet time today. "Thank me for the very things that are troubling you". Really? Have you ever have a moment when you know the Lord is talking directly to you? Well here is one of my moments. Times are hard and they will always be hard. The stress I am living with will continue to be there but only change slightly according to different situations in life.

My current stress in life.... What am I going to do with my life?! I have a job but I don't know where I will be located in a few months, I am moving all alone, going where I know no one, and starting brand new. Think about it. Everything is new. I have to find a church alone, I have to make friends alone, I have to work alone, I have to live in a hotel and soon an apt alone. This is scary stuff I am having to face. As I am having a small break down over it, I continue to read my quiet time and God beings screaming at me!

Philippians 4:6- Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Thank him for my troubles? God is a funny man. I honestly think so cause there are things he asks me to do that is not in my first nature to do. But that's the point right? He wants us to not do according to our nature but his own. Its a challenge to say the least but We have to do it. I am scared beyond anything else in the world! I am a planner that it drives me crazy sometimes. There has been two moments in my life where I did not have a plan. In High School there was a 2 wk period where I didn't know where I was going to school and in College when I didn't know my major for about a month. That's about it. I have always had most of my life planned to a tee and that has been my downfall the past couple of months. I can't plan everything because I don't know what tomorrow brings. Things change like the situation I am in now. I never thought I would be as lost and alone as I am right now but I am. And its time for me to trust in the Lord and know that everything is going to be OK. All the unknown of the future will remain there until I reach them. I don't know where I am living in 4 months... well Ill find out in about 3 months. No need to stress about it now cause I can't do anything about it! The Lord is going to do great things and I know I keep saying that and its a common theme in my Blogs but that's all I have. He has so much more to give me than what I have right now.

I am beyond pumped to find out what is to come and what has already happened that I haven't even learned from yet. But thats how we learn and grow in our faith for the Lord. Thats our day to day living! Things aren't the greatest right now but I know I will survive and the stress is out of my hands now!

My Blessing!

Best friends!!!! I couldn't ask for anything more than these girls. They have been by my side fighting for me and my love. They will always challenge me and make me feel like I am loved more than anyone deserves. I know my heart is broken right now but God is about to do great things for me. These women have showed me this in only a short week. I know it hard now but I will survive and I will be so proud of everything I have gone through. My theme song is Josh Wilson- Before the Morning! It is all about the pain we are going through now can't even compare to the joy we are about to experience. I have to hold on to that and trust it with everything I am. My heart is going to be rebuilt piece by piece because of the Faith in God and my Faith in my family and friends. These people will always love me even though he couldn't. I need to continue to pray and be in communication with the Lord.

So here comes another day! Its going to be hard and I am going to go through the highs and lows. I must keep talking about it so the healing keeps moving forward!! Thank you for everything I have been given Lord. These girls are at the top of that list! I couldn't of hand picked better friends than the ones you blessed me with. I love you so much and I am ready to keep on my day to day living!

Wait

Wait....

What a terrible word. Who ever first used that word was a terrible person I am sure of. Please Wait. Wait for your food. Wait for a plan. Wait for the future. And the list goes on and on. I know this isn't my strongest quality, waiting that is, but why does life have to be surrounded on waiting. It is just hard when you need information and all you can do is wait. You can't speed time up. Thank goodness I have invested in a blog. I know it is a blog that no one reads but it helps me gather my thoughts. I have a habit of my thoughts wondering very easily. My train of thought is always mixed up and NEVER makes sense even to me.

Wait. Wait. Wait. The Lord tells us to wait. We don't want us to control our lives. He tells us to wait and have our hearts wait on him. What a challenge he has set for us! Some people are able to take this challenge head on but I struggle with it every day! I find myself fighting against this mind set. A day to day living for me is learning to wait. I have been this way as long as I can remember. It is not something that I am accepting but I am this way and I have years and years of practice to work against. I am entering into a stage in my life that all I can do is wait. Wait for my job location, wait on my family situation, wait on a husband, wait on everything. I have no idea where my future will go but I need to continue to focus on the Lord and he will guide me there. It is the scariest thing I have come to terms with but I know I can do it. I am sure I will get lost but I have to trust when I am lost the Lord is waiting there waiting on me... and I know he will wait on me forever.

Wait... what a word... I think I am ready to embrace that word and have day to day living with it!

Hello Blog World!

So it has been a few days and my life is not too interesting. I am not a world traveler, crazy athlete playing in a world cup or anything like that. I am just another person getting through day to day events. I know that in the entire system of life I might not be that big of a deal but I am a big deal to people in my life. Example: my mom! I know what you are thinking. Moms are SUPPOSE to think you are a big deal. Honestly, I don't think we should assume that as a population. Moms have their own lives, sometimes jobs and social schedule. I know personally mine gives up a lot to insure I am OK. I mean the older I have gotten, I have noticed she has a ever growing social schedule but I know if I called her at the ripe age of 22 she should drop her schedule and be my mom. That is an exciting thing to realize.

Another example: God. Cheesy and easy answer but I am being serious!! He has literally taken the time to plan everything for us. I am sure it takes 0.0000001 seconds to do it but that is still time he is wasting on us. I am not sure if you have ever had a chilling moment with God but I sure have. In those moments, I know that nothing in the world is as important as I am to him. Let me tell you a story. So I am at the age of 12 where I fight with everyone and I hate everything. I was a pleasant child growing up except between the ages of 11-16. Those were dark long years for my family and I can never say sorry enough for how horrible I was. Any who.... I was 12 and decided to run away. I ran out of my house and down the street for about .25 miles (which felt like forever) and I stopped. I stood there and cried... well more like bawled! I cried and cried and cried. I am sure my neighbors thought I was crazy. So I started to pray feeling lost and alone. There there was a wind that blew me back. I ignore this burst of wind then it happened again and I looked around. The trees stood still, not a leaf moved but this wind blew so hard I stepped back. I was shocked! For a solid moment, my pain and hurt was the focus of the Lord. Nothing else in the world mattered except my hurt and loneliness. I turned and ran home knowing that was the Lords will!! CRAZY!!

Second Story: Well I ran a marathon last fall. I have begun training for my second one. Its hard since it is a million degrees outside!! The summer heat is not fun to run in. Anyways, for my first marathon I was not prepared or even close to properly complete it. I was not well educated but I still did it. So I am at mile 25.2 (a mile left) with blisters on bother feet that formed around mile 10. My hips were screaming at me, my legs had lost feeling, I couldn't catch my breath, no song could pump me up enough, nothing was working. I had a mile left and I was centimeters away from laying on the ground and making my family come find me in the woods of the trail I was running. I stopped running and was walking at a speed a 90 year old woman would have easily kept. As my knees are starting to bend to allow me to lay on the group my shirt it tugged! It scares me cause I physically felt it. Maybe the wind? Looked around, no wind. I continued to inch towards the ground then there was a hard tug on the front of my shirt... it was him! For a single moment I became his focus again. That moment was enough to keep me going and finish my marathon.

I have had 2 experiences my entire life that I have been the center of all his focus. I have always followed him and trusted in the Lord but those moments made me feel like a true daughter of his. He was able to take a break from him busy schedule to take care of me when I was too physically weak to continue on my journey. I do not consider myself a perfect follower but listen for a moment and trust in him during the good AND bad! He will always be there when he knows you can't continue without a little push or grab.

Well until next time, enjoy life and keep living day to day!

Life Choices

so I wrote this AWSOME post that was super entertaining and had all these life choices that needed to be made... but I don't know how to use my MAC and it got deleted. All of it is gone. When I say it was long, I mean it was long and amazing. Oh well I am sure I will find another story to entertain my blog with.

Long story short: Life choices are hard, but when it boils down the choices are always easy. It might not be something you completely want and it could hurt but the choices is clear and must be followed. The Lord never messes up what he has choosen us to do!

Another Day

So Another day has been successfully completed. Of course with plenty of rocks in it... but still completed.

Ugh the choices people live by... Its just frustrating. But why do I always find myself being the wrong one... WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE WAY I REACT TO THINGS?

Well until next time.

Lets Begin This

Hello Blogging World!!

So I have decided to begin a blog about my day to day life. Nothing too deep or witty or adventurous. Just the life that I live with all the boring stuff in between. I am not sure how often I will do this but I think it will be good for me to write things down. I have a terrible habit of beginning to think about a situation needing to be thought about, relationships that need some special attention or everything else and my mind wanders and I am left with nothing completed. Also I think blogging will help my spelling since I am TERRIBLE. I am an official graduate and I have a job, I must get a hold of my spelling issue and become an adult! So here is my first small step and the entire Internet community gets to be a part of it!! (I haven't told any of my friends or family about my blog because I am not funny or well spoken so I am sure no one will never read these)

So lets begin!

Why does life have to involve so much thinking? The main issue with my life is my mind. I am such an over thinker it sometimes hurt to even think about. I wish I could only focus on today and nothing else. Sadly, I have never been that way and even though I pray everyday to change my thought process I find my mind naturally moving back to that direction of planning and thinking too far into the future. I think its because sin finds our weakness and attacks!

Situation 1: Say there is a girl. A pretty normal girl but she has "daddy issues". Well this man comes into her life and he is perfect for her. He mets everything on her check list (all girls have one!) but she still struggles with the relationship. She is waiting for this man to leave her just like most other men in her life. Well that is not healthy. But why think that way? Because your mind is under attack!!!

I am a thinker. I know that and I hate it. I struggle with enjoying the nows in life and look forward to the maybes or what ifs. I don't want to be that 80 year old alone with a million dogs (I am anything but a cat person) and think "man I really should of enjoyed my 20s, 30s, 40s, etc!!" WHY blogging world? WHY? I am sure this has been asked a 100 times before and will be asked another 200+ more after. After thinking about a situation AFTER my reaction, I realize that my crazy planner future mind reacted and not the current mind. How do you find this happy middle?

Well thats just another day in my life! How is yours going?